The Subtle Art of Becoming a Bum

While being a bum is about being unemployed and doing nothing, it isn’t as bad as it actually is. That is, if you know the right things to do. Being a bum means having a lot of time in your hands, this is actually cool if used wisely. I have been a full time bum for 1 year and half now and although it’s a bit boring it can be really productive. Here’s how I’m filling my time.

  • Well, because I’m spending time at home I get to spend a lot of time with my family. I get to help my siblings with their home works, do some major cleaning ventures, or do any stuff that needs help. It’s a big relief to everyone who’s busy dealing with daily grind.
  • I travel a lot more than usual. Whether it’s just a trip down in the city or a trip somewhere little further, I always travel as much as I can. If someone says “I’ll be going to…..” it’s almost a reflex to answer with “Can I come?”

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Coffee Reads iii

Hello folks! It’s only Thursday but I am already in Uggh Monday mood bc regular classes starts  next week. It’s only start of a new sem but I can already feel the massive school work coming my way. Huhuhu. Anyway, I’m trying to be as productive as I can before I get caught up with all the school stuff. And so I have a new set of reads to start it off. Some of these tho are not as current bc I read them months ago. Regardless, I hope u still enjoy reading my thoughts on these books. Hihihi.

  • Before I Fall by Oliver Lauren

2 stars / 5 stars

The book has an interesting plot of a girl stuck on the last day of her life. Samantha Kingston a high school it girl, relives 12th of February every day and no matter how much she tries to break free, she seems to be stuck forever.

To be completely honest, I actually didn’t like it as much bc I knew what was gonna happen all along. I’ve watched bits and parts of the movie but my sister broke the whole story on me. Which is a bummer. It was a torture having to go through the entire book just because “I’ve started it already“. I do like the part where she discovers more of what really happens outside her inner circle –of how she realize other people’s presence and feelings, of how her friends are truly are and/or aren’t.

  • Everything, Everything by Nicola Yoon

3.5 stars / 5 stars

This is the first novel of Nicola Yoon but the second book that I’ve read from her. Tbh, I liked this more than the first read The Sun is also a Star. I enjoyed the writing style, IM chats, the illustrations by her husband and the way she illustrates the phrase “life is a gift”.

I really liked the character of Madeline Whittier, the why her thoughts flow is so genuine and so spot-on. Even with all her sickness, she’s friendly, cheerful and a huge dreamer. I think she and the guy are icons to positivity, despite their situations.

There has been a movie adaptation to this book and I think the boy is pretty cute. hihihi. Although I wish in the movie, they had given a little story to Rosa (her nurse’s daughter) and Kara (the guy’s sister). I feel like at some point they have a story of their own. But overall, I like how it was.

  • Falling Into Place by Amy Zhang

4 stars / 5 stars

This is a story of Liz Emerson –a popular it girl and a huge bully. She, basically just like any bully, rules out everyone. Everyone around her has every reason to hate her, and that’s including herself. She hated how she had become, she hated herself so much that she has started convincing herself to give up. The story shows her presence in other people’s lives, of how she came to be their nightmares or of how she used to be not that way.

I like the writing style; it’s soulful and pretty. But what’s crazy about it is that all of these deep feelings are coming from the debut author Amy Zhang, a high school student with a crazy talent. She was able to portray how powerful depression is and I think it also brings a lesson on how we can help people get over from it.

  • Every You, Every Me by David Levithan

4.5 stars / 5 stars

I’m starting to be in love with Levithan, no wait scratch that, I think I’m already in love. He writes stories that is so different but is not weird enough. Different in a good way. He’s not redundant; he always comes up with new brilliant ideas, things only he can think of. And his writing style is never the same.

So far, this book is my favorite of his. It’s so addicting and disturbing at the same time. Disturbing, in a way that it messes up with your mental state. I was reading the book in one sitting but halfway thru I forced myself to have a short minute break bc my mind and my whole body is getting so worked up. That was how much I’m into it. I must say I love all of it. I was so happy with how it all went from start to finish. One of my faves!

See more: Coffee Reads & Coffee Reads ii

My Creative Process

creative process

I have always been a slowpoke –somebody who moves, acts, responds, or works very slowly. “why do you speak so slow? Why do you eat so slow? Is there any way for you to move faster?” Not a big news. I always have been this way since I was little. While that’s not saying I hate it, but I’m not exactly loving it as well. I’m somewhere between I admit and accept it truly but I have to be productive/efficient while being so. This explains why the most I can update this blog is weekly, sometimes even more and I’m very sorry for that. Hihihi. I’m tryin to work on it. :))

 

This  goes hand in hand with my creative process. While being creative and creating stuff is my second nature, it has always been in a very slow pace.  I’d like to think my creative process has three stages; inspiration, motivation, and acceptance.

  • Inspiration – Ideas come to very randomly and expire almost as fast. That is why I always have with me a small notebook and a pen to write things down immediately so that ideas won’t float away. Sometimes however, nothing ever pops in my head no matter how hard I try. I had to dig thru everything (tumblr, pinterest, blogs, youtube) to keep the creative juice flowing but still no ideas are coming. But when inspiration does hit, it hits real hard. It comes flowing like forever, different ideas rushing all at once. It becomes overwhelming then turns stressful. The thoughts are racing in my head, I don’t know which goes first, and it’s a chaos. What I learned to do is I put everything down on paper (my journal), I write everything –every little thing so that I can visualize the ideas properly, without getting them mixed-up and blurred out. I write them down unfiltered and raw. I write keywords, usually in bullet form with no order. From there, I start managing and organizing them into which goes first and which doesn’t go anywhere.

process

  • Motivation is the hardest part. The motivation to start working on the ideas hits me not so oftenly (it’s a struggle). Planning and actually doing it has a very wide gap. Even when I have all the time in the world but when the motivation doesn’t come it just won’t happen. On the contrary, there are times when I’m crazy busy and that’s when adrenaline comes pumping. In other words, I’m a procrastinator. There are times when it works, there are times it doesn’t. The hidden key is to just do it no matter what mood you’re in, just start working on it and see how it goes. Having a cup of coffee and pastries helps me get into work mode easily.

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  • Say for instance, in journaling, one thing that scares me most is to making mistake or to not like the output that I made. I hesitate a lot before starting and bc of that I visualize and plan every move very carefully but that doesn’t ensure perfection it even raises frustration. But over time, I learned that letting my hands do the work and surprising myself at the end is the joy of creating. And it’s that joy that feeds my hunger to create more no matter how slow I get there.

 

So, how bout you guys? I would love to hear the process behind every great content that you have.

My Journal

my journal

It is almost end of the year and I still suck at journaling. Nevertheless, it’s still an achievement that I made an official one. I started journaling a few years ago but it was never a real thing, like with the monthly entries, themes, and the whatnots. It was plainly for writing down random stuff and whenever I feel like it.

TTT

Don’t be shock but I started midway of 2017. Bc July is my birth month! Hihi

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For October I decided to go with a blue theme. 

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This was a travel entry from my trip in Manila. 

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This one’s a little special bc it’s self reflection entry.

I’m hoping to get better at doing more journals and arts. I  really just enjoy the process of doing it and flipping back through the past entries. For now, I will be sharing some of the entries that I made. Hope you like them!

anigif

P.S. I did try scanning them but I didn’t like how it went. So, I collaged it into a gif bc sayang ang effort ko. Hahahaha.

Caffeinated Thought: Love

There was a girl who grew up poor of love, so growing up she craved for it. With a dear heart, she started looking for love then. ”I looked everywhere” she said “but still I couldn’t find it” . She searched in every crack, in every ocean, in every hand she held, in every eye she stared. “Maybe it’s just not meant for me” Or maybe you weren’t looking at the right way. Love is universal. It’s a cycle and it never dies. It just needs a little nurturing and growing. There is love in every breath we take. But it’s not the kind of love you’re running for. You see, love is designed for a purpose. It’s for patience, for heartbreak, for grace, for salvation. But it’s never the same for everyone. It needs time and waiting. We have to stop searching and look at it in a different light and breathe it in in the right way.

Weekend Notes

To be completely honest, this post is long overdue *cough 2wks overdue cough*.But you know what they say, better late than never. 

BLOGBASE

Over the weekend, I finally got to catch up on my dentist appointment which was another subject for long overdue. Thankfully, after what happened in Marawi seige, my dentist managed to get a new clinic in Iligan City.

 

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After that, we went to check out blooper’s new branch in Tibanga for lunch. Of course, gotta have to have the fave, Taro. I went with my sister and my couzies.

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The next day, we went to the mall to run some errands. Everyone has their own thing to do. As for me, I went to buy a new powder because I run down the old one that I use. It took me more than 1 year to finally finish it whole. And that was a first, usually I’d buy a new one before I even finish the whole thing just bc you get tired of using the same thing everyday for a long time.

I got this powder from Hypoallergenic in golden beige shade. Apparently, Hypoallergenic is from same company that produces Celeteque. And that’s a good thing bc I really like celeteque. The saleslady said it’s made of organic materials and is very good for sensitive skin (I really hope so).

I hope everyone’s having a great weekend!

What does your soul looks like?

What does your soul looks like?

It is said that eyes are reflection of the soul. If my soul would look like my eyes then I’m a melancholic soul—a soul that feeds on sadness.

She was happy but not for long. She learned to open her eyes thenceforth life dimmed her to the glory of obscurity. Blinded by the thought that she’s a mediocre; not a faint of courage within her. Happy things became her heavy sorrows, she lost gaiety. She was sincere and dull; she was dark and hoped she could say beautiful but she was unlovely,  a little evil though she keeps it for herself. She’ll never tell you but she falls in love too easily, too deeply. Maybe it’s all that suppressed incandescence. When the numbness is shattered, she grows into a passionate flame, blazing of life. Tell her she’s the moon in your sky, the poetry of your eyes and she’ll be everything she is not.

 

This is an old journal entry. If I have to answer the question now, I would say a lot has change since then. 

From the Girl They Called Introvert

There are a lot of things I could do and things I’d like to do. Too many waiting opportunities. All these are kept waiting bc I am bounded by time and destiny. I was born and raised in the wrong dynasty and by the wrong timing. I was meant to be a singer or a writer, a traveler, an advocate, a risk taker, an adventurer. But no I was damned and defined as the lousy boring girl spending every second of her life in the four cornered wall she calls bedroom, rotting the life out of her.

When things didn’t work out for you

You have the right to be depressed when your work doesn’t pay off. Be sad. Cry. Let it all out. But don’t just end it there. What you are feeling right now will pass. You have to pick up your courage and start to move on. But how exactly?

Reflect on your act. Try to remember where it went wrong. Dissect your actions and your thoughts; ask yourself why it didn’t work out? And once you found it, work on it. Use it as an opportunity to improve yourself. Make it a driving force to go beyond your limit. Help yourself become better because you are a work in progress. You are meant for something much much bigger. And remember that no good deed with clean intention is ever wasted. It will always have its purpose; it might be a lesson or an opening to something bigger. You only need to believe. And while you’re at it enjoy the process.

 

-Hafsa

 

P.S. This is me writing to myself, trying to comfort every depressed bone in me.

The Happy List

How do you make yourself happy without depending on other people to make it happen for you? List them. Here’s mine:

  • productive long nights
  • cold weather
  • coffee and tea
  • great ideas
  • clean room
  • getting work done
  • doing good deeds
  • pampered self
  • proper workout
  • spirit revival session
  • good reads
  • building/making something

I get depress easily and I really hate it. What I do is I try to do these stuffs regularly. I noticed that the key is to not get soaked in the emotion and make an actual effort to fight it. So, making a list of the things that you know makes you happy and then do it. Srsly, just do it.